The Pen May Not Always Win Over the Knife

I am not the same person all the time. Both of us are mad, but only one of us is ungovernable. One version of me looks on at the other; the latter can't stop crying. Her thoughts are singularly focused on her tool of choice, which is only a few feet away. She wants to… Continue reading The Pen May Not Always Win Over the Knife

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SA Journal 5: So, I Hate Everybody, Allegedly.

“Have you settled down and made some new friends?” This was the second question my mother asked me on the phone several weeks ago, after, of course, “Have you found a church?” I think, after every season of my life, I convince myself that I’m completely okay with being regarded by others as odd, excluded,… Continue reading SA Journal 5: So, I Hate Everybody, Allegedly.

Prayers God Chooses Not To Hear

You have been taught that God is omnipotent and omniscient. You believe both of these things. You know what it feels like to have prayers answered, whether significant or mundane. You have had problems large enough that thousands of dollars were at stake, and problems as small as flies disturbing your sanity by buzzing around… Continue reading Prayers God Chooses Not To Hear

SA Journal 4: The Foreignness Is Not Equal

This is something I complain about often: I knew who Hitler was, way before I knew what Hitler really did. It’s the power of heavily-circulated rhetoric. Even before you’re conscious of it, you’ve digested that if you have any sense in the world, you should hate him. I am still deeply disturbed that I didn’t… Continue reading SA Journal 4: The Foreignness Is Not Equal